I wonder if this kid knows he is loved. I wonder if when I was holding him if it was passed from me to him. I was trying my hardest to get it through...but I still wonder. We pray for these kids. We feed the ones we have money to feed. We play with them and give them stickers and trinkets. But do they know? Do they understand? God, I hope so. 
I was kind of stressed out about the washing machine thing...not because I thought that God wasn't going to show up...but because you know...here I was, asking or presenting a need, a financial need and it is kind of uncomfortable...like it always is when people talk about money. But you know, just like that...God did His thing and some people...amazing people stepped up and yay! Done. Thank you, but negotiations are now closed. Done. Zip-locked. Yay.
Titus 3:5-7
"He saved us- not by works of righteousness that we had done, but according to His mercy, through the washing of regeneration and renewal by the Holy Spirit. This Spirit He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that having been justified by His grace, we may become heirs with the hope of eternal life."
More to come!!
Psalm 51:9-13
"Turn Your face away from my sins and blot out all my guilt. God, create a clean heart for me and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not banish me from Your presence or take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore the joy of Your salvation to me, and give me a willing spirit. Then I will teach the rebellious Your ways, and sinners will return to You."
We really do have a way to FREEDOM, you know? I have been kind of wound up so tight these last few days...so stressed, and really, what for? God has brought to light something that just made me realize that He is so incredible and Holy and awesome, and here, I have been all crazy-like. So what has made me so insecure is that two girls from the States have come over to help out at Oceans and for some reason I got all weird. 
They are super cool and I am super not. We haven't had interaction from Americans for like what? EVER and they are so nice and sweet and wonderful and then there is me...I don't know why I am acting so "insecure". Normally at home I have confidence, but here, now, after 4 months of not having friends my own age...it is like I am an alien or something. Why can't I just be myself? Why can't I just say how I feel or think? I think that is the problem...I am saying what I think and feel and it isn't joyful or encouraging because I haven't been around joyful or encouraging people...we have been the ones to do that here...so when we are FINALLY around people who "get it" and speak "our" language...I freak out. But that isn't right either. God is still the God of hope and joy. In all circumstances, right? Right? So today after reading through more of the Psalms that He has been taking me through I come back to this amazing verse about liberating freedom. A clean heart full of a steadfast and a willing spirit. Joyfulness. Sign-me-up!
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