Prison
Sunday mornings are a horrible situation for a lot of people. So many of us fight with our loved ones-scream at the kids-speed and drive like maniacs to make it on time...okay ready? Act normal! Walk through the door, put on your happy face and "fine, you?" with your fake smile and wrinkle free suit. So stupid!
For Daniel and I, we were so "lucky" to be free of that "fake" the last year we were in Kansas. We had found a real church family that really sought us out and looked past our Sunday morning fights and awkward behavior. Our small group circle actually hung out -out side of our designated Monday night time slot and pushed through the hard questions and "uncomfortable". They were stable and real. The church inside the building and out was solid in Biblical truth and doctrine. I can not tell you how incredible and important both of those things really are.
We have now been in Africa for about 4 months and have been in Sunday church most of those...we have yet to hear a Godly message. Harsh but true. Yeah, there are pieces here and there. We get a glimpse of truth, get hopeful but then like an explosion-a bomb will go off with something somebody says. Today at the church we visited the guy speaking said (and I quote) "It is not about scripture, it is about how we feel, what is in our heart's...."WHAT????? Seriously! If it isn't about scripture, the infallible word of God, then I must have been mistaken these past 16 years. Dang, my bad. I wanted to scream. I needed a shot in the head. Last week the same guy said that the church in Jerusalem (back in Bible days) needed to be allowed to die because if it didn't then - by now it would have been corrupted...that is why churches have a life cycle. I didn't follow that logic at all. I thought he needed a shot in the head.
Bla bla bla. So I guess in telling you all of that, I feel that in all the times that I just struggled to get in the door back in the States, I never really struggled with doctrine or truth. I mean there were somethings that I questioned or maybe things that I didn't agree with that people said in the pulpit...(that I brought up in conversations later) but that is iron sharpening iron right? Non-essentials. Here, we can't even find a safe, sound, doctrinally true church. One that will preach (or teach) the gospel without diluting it. Where is it? Because it isn't here in these plastic chairs with people whooping and hollering, waving their flags and telling me it is about their feelings and not about scripture...this is the um-teeth church we have visited.
I am a pretty out of the box thinker and worshiper. I don't have to sing the same boring songs and sit in the same boring seat every Sunday...but I do expect those who are called to be preachers and teachers to preach and teach. Seriously. What are they doing up there if not that? Then to rightly divide the Word? Don't get me wrong...I am not saying they have to do it the way I want them to do it...but I do expect it in a way that doesn't contradict the Bible. Seriously. I am not all about compromise and these people seem to think that wherever "the spirit" (which spirit, I don't know) leads is what everybody needs to be doing. There is no rhyme or reason to any of it. it is a free for all.
I am so lonely for solid communion with the body of believers. Where is the church in South Africa? please God, please God send, lead, guide. We need to corporately worship.
We can't even contribute or serve here. We are hungry to minister to the body and our hearts and hands are tied there as well.
Please...something.
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